New Threat Levels Because Of Egypt Crisis

View previous topic View next topic Go down

New Threat Levels Because Of Egypt Crisis

Post by Beast on Mon Feb 07, 2011 6:05 pm

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved."

Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross...." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Hide” to “Run”. The only two higher levels in France are “Surrender” and “Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be all right, mate." Three more escalation levels remain: "Crikey!," "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend," and "The barbie is canceled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

Beast

Posts : 20
Join date : 2011-02-06

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: New Threat Levels Because Of Egypt Crisis

Post by Babsi on Mon Feb 07, 2011 8:14 pm

Laughing
avatar
Babsi

Posts : 580
Join date : 2011-02-06

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: New Threat Levels Because Of Egypt Crisis

Post by Alaskan on Tue Feb 08, 2011 11:05 am

lol! Glass bottomed subs!

Alaskan
Guest


Back to top Go down

Re: New Threat Levels Because Of Egypt Crisis

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum